Howdy folks! This post has been a long time coming, as Williamson County seems to be a frequent fixture of my inbox. Fortunately, the Nashville suburb did not disappoint.

This 4500 square foot esteemed piece of real estate, built in 2012, boasts 4 bedrooms and 4 baths, and somehow manages to spend over $1 million USD doing it.

Despite spending that much money, they fortunately didn’t allocate funds to a lawyer foyer, so we’re left to start with the formal dining room.

Dining Room

You see, stolen window units are just a risk of ground-floor urban life, and if you don’t like it you can go make enough money to rent some place with central air in this economy!!

Office

The best thing about this house is that it’s decorated as if the recession never happened and we all just kept doing 2005 forever.

Great Room

In interesting and related news, a report came out from UCLA regarding a study about what spaces Americans who own giant ass houses actually spend the most time in. To absolutely nobody’s surprise, the answer is the kitchen and the informal living room. The point is, all the jokes On Here about grandiose spaces nobody ever uses is now backed by EVIDENCE.

Kitchen

IN THE TOP LEFT HAND CORNER OF THIS IMAGE YOU CAN SPOT THREE MORE TEAPOTS.

Master Bedroom

this is a suspicious number of pillows. pretty sure we might be witnessing a case of illicit pillow laundering.

Master Bath

The only thing that can explain the excessive number of duplicate objects in this house is elaborate divorce planning. What cynical times we live in.

Powder Room

did they glue that seal on there or???

THEATRE ROOM

man don’t u hate it when u spend all ur money on a theatre room and u don’t have enough left over for the theatre part? relatable content

Game Room

A huge subset of middle-class and rich people decorating is spending money on signs that signify what a room is used for (KITCHEN = the word EAT; pictures of food. BATH = the word BATH; pictures of tubs.)

Well, folks, that does it for the interior portion of our house but don’t worry, there’s still the

Rear Exterior

Why is it that there’s often better symmetry in the rear exteriors of McMansions? My guess: custom home clients are only really concerned with the front facade and therefore it’s subject to more of their meddling.

Well, that does it for Tennessee! Stay tuned for a new Looking Around this weekend and next week’s TEXAS SPECIAL. Stay cool!

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Copyright Disclaimer: All photographs are used in this post under fair use for the purposes of education, satire, and parody, consistent with 17 USC §107. Manipulated photos are considered derivative work and are Copyright © 2018 McMansion Hell. Please email kate@mcmansionhell.com before using these images on another site. (am v chill about this)

50 States of McMansion Hell: Williamson County, Tennessee